Maxwel Francois PB&J

This website is an archive, dedicated to the preservation of my brother’s life, spirit, and energy.
it is a space holding equal parts of grief and celebration.Maxwel was a beloved Sun, his chosen family orbiting around him; then and forever.
I am lucky to share in the collective memory of loving and adoring him --His #1 fan and, in turn, my star pupil-
MR PB&J (Older Sister #1)

CLICK A PIC!

Maxwel, my younger brother, a black boy with rich brown skin, poses with a new kitten. The kitten, is small and black and nestled in his arms, looking away from the camera. There are premade Christmas photoshoot decorations in the background.

Another day, I miss him. I found myself yesterday, going about my evening, just thinking “something is wrong here” followed by a resounding cry of “where is Max…where is my brother?”. This happened with no words uttered from my mouth, and no tears; just a silent breaking as I reminded myself he is not able to be present. I miss him terribly. I miss his smile, his warmth, his humor. His willingness to try new things, his joy. I hate that a curable disease took him from this world early, that there was so much I could not protect him or his spirit from. He was a real joy, before the happenings started, and even then, he remained intelligent and wise, when he could manifest it. He hurt my heart in many ways, but mainly because so much of my life force went into his care. I lost 10 pounds because I could not eat for the first 2 months of losing him, and so lately I have had to treat taking care of myself like taking care of him. Because I loved him so, and I will not wither in defeat of this life, if only for now just because he would find it extremely lame of me to do this for him. I’m planning to make him an epic story instead. After that, well, we’ll just have to see.
-MR PB&J 02-14-25

This day was so rebellious of us. Maxwel and I had been on one of our outings. It was rainy, he was vaping at this time. I got it in my head that we needed a cat to ground the household, and Maxwel of course agreed. I planned not to tell our mom until we arrived home, but Maxwel has always been uber honest with her, perhaps seeing our mom’s character even better than me and T. We went to a local county shelter, and this little black cat howled from the moment we got in there. My brother said, “I want to hold that one,” and all the workers were like…are you sure? Tobi had a yellow tag because he was considered feisty, but he was just scared. He settled down immediately in my brother’s arms, I adopted him for free, and the shelter offered this complimentary photo! Tobi had gone missing for 20 minutes (hiding under towels) right before this. Both had a penchant for drama.
Recount of December 18th, 2021
2-14-25, MR PB&J

a good reflection of my brother’s approach to life, teehee. he was year of the rooster. HAPPY LNY!
2-3-25 MR PB&J 12:07am
(img cred:Naoko Takeuchi, sailor moon vol 1)
{posted by theisb on tumblr}